During my discernment process of opening a domestic violence shelter, I have been reminded over and over again to seek balance. Whether an internal reminder when I overdo it in an area of my life, or an external reminder from a mentor and/or inspirational articles to help me stay engaged with my goal, I am reminded how crucial this little detail is to success. One of the ways that I am incorporating motivational articles into my life is through Flipboard, an app on my phone. Why an app? Although I usually resist the urge to join the current century, it is important for me to have something at my fingertips with enough variety to keep me interested, and quick enough to fit into my Miracle Mornings (without keeping me glued to a book that is too good to put down). And I like that I can choose the categories, which allows me to weed out anything that is too negative or ethically objectionable! This morning, I read one article titled, "10 Gratitude Mantras that Will Make You Appreciate What You Have," and another titled, "How to Destroy Your Comfort Zone and Optimise Your Success." In my journey towards achieving balance, I am faced with what seems to me as two contradicting definitions: the corporate definition of success - drive, motivation, and constant persistence - and the more "warm and fuzzy, Buddha style approach" - being present, grounded, and accepting what comes. After reading these articles, it occurred to me that the combination is a perfect match of the balance that I have been seeking as I walk on the tightrope of life. Through much self-study, I have learned that it is important to come from a place of being centered, where self and/or other critique cannot touch us, or as Walt Whitman was quoted, "O to be self balanced for contingencies. To confront night, storms, hunger, ridicule, accidents, rebuffs as the trees and the animals do." However, it is also important to stretch outside of our comfort zones, for this is where many gurus attest that the real change occurs. Being in a Goldilocks level (the soup is not too hot and not too cold) of "optimal anxiety" is what the comfort zone article suggests to strive toward being the best version of ourselves, thus becoming who we are called to be. But what does this mean? According to the notes that I jotted down on a napkin during breakfast, it is important to be comfortable enough to step outside of our comfort zones, but uncomfortable enough that we are open to real change. The article uses a mountain climber analogy to explain that it is helpful to take small steps toward achieving our big goals. In other words, mountain climbers "start with smaller peaks until they build up a tolerance...plateau and achieve a steady state of performance, then destroy that tolerance until they reach the next peak." Since I prefer to replace all negative and/or potentially violent words, I would substitute "overcome" for "destroy" and when you read the article, you can do the same, i.e. substitute the "Gratitude Mantra 1. When life is good, enjoy it. Don't go looking for something better. Happiness never comes to those who don't appreciate what they have," with the following: "Gratitude Mantra 1. When life is good, enjoy it. Be present in the current moment. Happiness comes to those who appreciate what they have." Keep reading until you get to Gratitude Mantras 9 and 10, as these are some of my favorites! To end, since we have been using a mountain analogy and my domestic violence shelter will be opened in Cochabamba, Bolivia, which is home to some of the most beautiful mountains I have ever seen, this quote sums up quite well my goal of achieving balance: "This is the place where the journey begins. Half rooted into the earth, half floating in the endless sky. What would it be like to be the mountain?" -Leza Lowitz For me, it is important to combine both articles, using the first one to keep coming back to a state of renewal and being present in gratitude to what I currently have, and the second one to take small risks to bring myself out of my comfort zone and to a place where I can make real change in my life. After all, if I want to change the world, I first have to start with myself.
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AuthorValerie Ellis, who is in alignment with the Black Lives Matter Movement and everyone whose life is impacted, now or before, by times of social injustice. Archives
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